This morning a dear friend of mine had some sage advice for another friend of ours going through some trials and tribulations... we've all been "there" and perhaps may go "there" again so I thought I would share her advice... Just in case you are "there" right now...
Thank you Paula for these words:
"If you're not being treated with love and respect, check your price tag. Perhaps you have marked yourself down. It's you who tells people what you're worth by what you accept.
Get off the clearance rack & get behind the glass where they keep the valuables! Bottom line: value yourself more! If you don't, no one else will!
Time to get yourself OFF the CLEARANCE RACK girlfriend :) ....just thought I'd share this one with you suga....xoxo's ...it's actually a good lesson for all of us!"
Love Well. Love Wisely.
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Saturday, July 9, 2011
Romance Novels and Condoms
Read an interesting article the other day about condoms and romance novels and there's been a bit of a firestorm around it. I must say, I am enjoying the conversation... Condom Usage in Romance Novels.
There was a little blame being thrown towards the novels that they portray their heroines as being mostly against using a condom when they meet the man of their dreams... and that it has a negative effect on the use of condoms in the real world... hmmm. While I believe we all must take personal responsibility for ALL of our choices, I think romance novels, TV shows, movies, etc have a profound effect on our society and should take the opportunity to make a positive impact on sexual health in this country...
I read a response to the accusation in another BLOG-Family Planning and Romance where the author took the side of "it isn't the book's fault that a woman decides not to use a condom" While intellectually I agree, I wonder if the Romance Novel World could be the format where a revolution could take place, that our heroines ALWAYS make strong choices to protect their sexual health, where even on another planet, and during a different time they would all use a condom, since the readers live here and now, and are facing STD epidemics, and a huge stigma against carrying and using condoms...
What do you think? Do you want to read about your Heroine pulling out her Just In Case compact out of her purse across a crowded dinner party? Winking at her lover because he knows what's in there? I do!! ;)
Of course I had a little something to say about it so here was one of my comments:
While I agree that the romance novel isn't to blame for the negative image the condom may have, we have an epidemic of STD's HIV that the romance novel world could have a very positive impact on. I don't believe her "study" is valid in any way but I'm glad it has sparked a conversation about women and condom use. I believe women have taken a back seat in their own protection for many generations because the man was supposed to always carry the condoms... women just don't have the luxury of ignorance anymore. Ignorance can have very serious consequences these days if not kill you. My mom and I went into business to create a way for women to carry their own condoms discreetly and beautifully Just In Case compacts - so that when she meets that hero who sweeps her off her feet sex can be a bit safer... Funny enough we were featured in the Daytime Emmy gift bags... basically the award show for televised romance novels and we were almost kicked out of the bag because the "powers that be" didn't want condoms associated with the Emmy's... We have a long way to go in bridging a bit of reality in our fantasy... daytime TV hasn't had the guts to do it yet... Maybe Romance Novels can lead the charge!! xo
There was a little blame being thrown towards the novels that they portray their heroines as being mostly against using a condom when they meet the man of their dreams... and that it has a negative effect on the use of condoms in the real world... hmmm. While I believe we all must take personal responsibility for ALL of our choices, I think romance novels, TV shows, movies, etc have a profound effect on our society and should take the opportunity to make a positive impact on sexual health in this country...
I read a response to the accusation in another BLOG-Family Planning and Romance where the author took the side of "it isn't the book's fault that a woman decides not to use a condom" While intellectually I agree, I wonder if the Romance Novel World could be the format where a revolution could take place, that our heroines ALWAYS make strong choices to protect their sexual health, where even on another planet, and during a different time they would all use a condom, since the readers live here and now, and are facing STD epidemics, and a huge stigma against carrying and using condoms...
What do you think? Do you want to read about your Heroine pulling out her Just In Case compact out of her purse across a crowded dinner party? Winking at her lover because he knows what's in there? I do!! ;)
Of course I had a little something to say about it so here was one of my comments:
While I agree that the romance novel isn't to blame for the negative image the condom may have, we have an epidemic of STD's HIV that the romance novel world could have a very positive impact on. I don't believe her "study" is valid in any way but I'm glad it has sparked a conversation about women and condom use. I believe women have taken a back seat in their own protection for many generations because the man was supposed to always carry the condoms... women just don't have the luxury of ignorance anymore. Ignorance can have very serious consequences these days if not kill you. My mom and I went into business to create a way for women to carry their own condoms discreetly and beautifully Just In Case compacts - so that when she meets that hero who sweeps her off her feet sex can be a bit safer... Funny enough we were featured in the Daytime Emmy gift bags... basically the award show for televised romance novels and we were almost kicked out of the bag because the "powers that be" didn't want condoms associated with the Emmy's... We have a long way to go in bridging a bit of reality in our fantasy... daytime TV hasn't had the guts to do it yet... Maybe Romance Novels can lead the charge!! xo
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Throw Me Somethin' Mister!!
I live in the heart of Mardi Gras and was fortunate enough to have the opportunity to ride on one of the floats this past weekend. We threw beads and stuffed animals into a fun wanting crowd and it made me think...there's a certain element of "power" in the brief moment you are giving a small something to a few people in a crowd that went to great lengths to be in the best place they could be to receive these small trinkets.
I can relate this feeling on a small level to the many senators and why they have such a hard time cutting anything out of the budget since they have constituents in their home states or districts, waiting for their small trinkets.
Of course we told friends what float we would be on, what side of the float, and they in turn told us exactly where they would be standing on the route so we would be prepared with armfuls of the best beads just for them... but there was also plenty to evenly throw to the rest of the crowd...
In these times of struggle that we all find ourselves in, there is a collective request for people to make sacrifices, spend less, save more, so that we can all get through this tough economic environment... but somehow there are politicians who hold on to their armfuls of loot just for their buddies while neglecting the rest of the crowd...
When you have senators and government officials telling their friends where exactly to stand on their parade route so they can throw them armfuls of no-bid contracts, and pet projects, it becomes exceedingly frustrating for the rest of the crowd who get next to nothing and who would simply be happy with the basics; better schools for our kids, and the right to collective bargaining to maintain a living wage.
So even though at the end of the day we are all well aware that you are going to throw your friends a few more special items than the strangers in the crowd, let the beads fly to everyone else too so we can feel as if you are actually in office to make your whole state and country a better place where people can feel they get something from the effort they are putting forth.
I can relate this feeling on a small level to the many senators and why they have such a hard time cutting anything out of the budget since they have constituents in their home states or districts, waiting for their small trinkets.
Of course we told friends what float we would be on, what side of the float, and they in turn told us exactly where they would be standing on the route so we would be prepared with armfuls of the best beads just for them... but there was also plenty to evenly throw to the rest of the crowd...
In these times of struggle that we all find ourselves in, there is a collective request for people to make sacrifices, spend less, save more, so that we can all get through this tough economic environment... but somehow there are politicians who hold on to their armfuls of loot just for their buddies while neglecting the rest of the crowd...
When you have senators and government officials telling their friends where exactly to stand on their parade route so they can throw them armfuls of no-bid contracts, and pet projects, it becomes exceedingly frustrating for the rest of the crowd who get next to nothing and who would simply be happy with the basics; better schools for our kids, and the right to collective bargaining to maintain a living wage.
So even though at the end of the day we are all well aware that you are going to throw your friends a few more special items than the strangers in the crowd, let the beads fly to everyone else too so we can feel as if you are actually in office to make your whole state and country a better place where people can feel they get something from the effort they are putting forth.
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Mob-Mentality and the Blame Game
I am troubled by the news lately... while I'm all for smaller government and limited spending, I always find it interesting that the first cuts initialized are the programs for health and education. While I agree there are issues with both (there are issues with any large programs) these are basic needs that need to be met in this country for us to succeed. We need healthy, educated people to create a strong nation. I also find it interesting that people are screaming for a smaller government except when it comes to abortion rights. These are the same people who believe that patients should be able to deal directly with their doctors and be treated accordingly without insurance and government butting in... except for abortions. Ms Bachmann speaks about abortions as if they are convenient drive through procedures that take place on a whim. She is insane.
Don't fool yourselves, we pay no matter what. When it comes to abortions by choice, we need to look further than the procedure itself. What is lacking on the path to this procedure? Education? self-esteem? Better adoption services? Who are the people we can reach before they get to this very dramatic and devastating result? We need to reach out our hands to these people and stop pointing fingers. We won't reach them all but we should be ashamed of ourselves if we don't try something other than making it illegal and throwing people in jail. That helps no one.
This is a billboard currently in New York... I understand it is trying to make a bold statement to start a "conversation", but I am afraid that all it will start is mob-mentality induced blame game. We are better than this and can do better by our countrymen. If you are passionate about making abortion illegal, what have you done to make it unnecessary?
Don't fool yourselves, we pay no matter what. When it comes to abortions by choice, we need to look further than the procedure itself. What is lacking on the path to this procedure? Education? self-esteem? Better adoption services? Who are the people we can reach before they get to this very dramatic and devastating result? We need to reach out our hands to these people and stop pointing fingers. We won't reach them all but we should be ashamed of ourselves if we don't try something other than making it illegal and throwing people in jail. That helps no one.
This is a billboard currently in New York... I understand it is trying to make a bold statement to start a "conversation", but I am afraid that all it will start is mob-mentality induced blame game. We are better than this and can do better by our countrymen. If you are passionate about making abortion illegal, what have you done to make it unnecessary?
Thursday, September 2, 2010
World AIDS Day 2010
World AIDS Day 2010 is of course December 1st of every year... it is a time to reflect on the progress we have made and the long road ahead of us. Until there is a cure, prevention is paramount. We are all responsible for our own actions, our own sexual health... if you choose to have sex, and you aren't 100% sure of your status or your partner's, you owe it to yourself to use a condom and lessen the chance of contracting HIV or STD's... Love yourself enough.
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Win a Just In Case Condom Compact!!
Thank you Swa-Rai Fashion and Lifestyle Blog for such a great review and post!!! Enter her contest to win a compact!
Love Well. Love Wisely.
Love Well. Love Wisely.
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